Can I keep the "Respect"?

God said to the man, "Man loves your woman!'
God said to the woman, "Woman respects your man!" Both words are in the Bible. These are what I learn from my yesterday, Sunday Worshipping.

When I said I just learn it means...... I know what love and respect is but never have deep thought about how the love and respect links strongly between a married couple. It DOES!!!

I have love to my husband but I also do have moment of yelling, throwing hurting words, not listing etc.,.... lack of respect not only one or two times but in my 19 years of marriage life, I have many many disrespect times with Robins. When Pastor was busy sharing about love and respect, I was busy asking to myself too. I asked to myself, "Why I do not keep respect???" The only nearest answer to myself was, "I reacted instantly!" and.. the next comes, "May be I am expecting too much."

Then I said, "Well... he provokes me too!" Sound like excuse right?

Can I give you an example what provoke mean to me? : Last night we went out for dinner. Me, Robins, the two Americans Business man, Ning (A Thai lady) and her husband who is from Austria. By the way I had a nice time with them because I like them. The reason I like them is, lots of laughing! Easy going and the conversation just flowed. There is no one minute to pretend that I like them. I just naturally like them the way they are.

Somehow the conversation heading about my blog. Jack (not his real name), said "Oh Helen you have blog?'
I said, "Yes!'
Jack said, "Can I have your address. You will see lots of people will read.,"
I said, " Well.. my English is not that good you know.''
At the moment my lovely husband jumped in and said.,
"Oh yeah, her English is bad... sometime I did not understand what she's saying.,"

(Sometimes Robins forgot that I am not born with English and I do not have Education as high as he has either. I always said to him if I were raised in USA with a pair of parent as he has, I will be as big as Hillary Clinton (not the looks but the brain is what I mean here!). I might also be the First Lady too!")

Honestly I will say this.... if not the yesterday from Sunday morning worshiping about love and respect, I will give back to Robins real real good on that moment and on the spot! But surprisingly, I shut my mouth. I just accepted that if this is what he wants to say, let him say it. I learn to respect or may be learn more to ignore it or I am in still confusing!! I think both combine will work for me well. OK I have been honest here.

See the point here? Why can't he say, "I am glad she can write that much even born and raised on the mountain. I am so proud of her for trying her best. Yeah.. her blog is interesting!!" Then the respect will be building bigger and bigger in my heart! Right? (By the way I have many people poking my blog even with my own bad English!!).

I will end with Pastor sharing from yesterday. Here it is..........

"I once knew a very old married couple who radiated a tremendous happiness. The wife especially, who was almost unable to move because of old age and illness and in whose kind old face the joys and sufferings of many years had etched a hundred lines, was filled with such a gratitude for life that I was touched to the quick.

Involuntarily, I asked myself what could possibly be the source of this kindly person's radiance. In every other respect they were common couple, and their room indicated only the most modest comfort. But suddenly I knew where it all came from, for I saw those tow speaking to each other their eyes hanging upon each other. All at once it became clear to me that this woman was dearly loved.

It was not because she was a cheerful and pleasant person that she was loved by the husband all those years. It was the other way around. Because she was so loved she became the person I saw before me.

from :"Because She was loved" by Helmut Thielicke, How the World Began."

I do have respect for Robins has not cheating on me for 19 years!! The more I grew older I know for sure that a good married is not base on Material. Not at all but help very little such as short time happiness.

How many pair of shoes I can buy right???