Robins went to Soul, South Korea for WAS meeting. He brought back 2 books for me as a present from Nick, who lives in Australia. One of the book is Agamennon's Kiss. I was reading it the last 3 days ago. The Author is Inga Clendinnen. I think she got her new liver between 1988 and 1994 in Austin Hospital in Melbourne. I like the book! As myself was a transplant patient, I understand very well that how she felt. She put it into a book was the best too. In her book.....
Inga said: People on the waiting list panic easily. They need to know somethings, but not others, and they haven't yet learnt to trust the medicos, who naturally want to control the information flow so that no one get muddled or demoralised. But we sometimes meet. Before my transplant I had just seen my doctor and was waiting by the units's lift, shaking, yellow, cradling my distended belly with my arms........
I said: I did panic too. Somehow my trust in God help me alot. Believe me if I say... my prayers put me very peaceful in my mind also admitted that sometime the scare did hit me. My trusting in my doctors is another help . I am a person who never take pill before till my first operation nor never been to the hospital. To be honest, I did not want to know detail that what is going to happen after my transplant!!! I rather deal with day by day...sure I do not want to die. The reason is "My son is only 11 years old". Another way to deal for worry is...talking! I did talk to most of the patients who already got the new liver. It is help because I learnt that patients have different problems after the transplant. My recovery was pretty good!
Inga said: To end with a long leap from narcissism to altruism. Transplant patients are a motley lot:different classes, levels of education, religions, ethnicities. Most of them are the sort of people I would never meet in my daily life. Now we feel a special tenderness for each other. We have been, are and will always be in the same boat.
I said: Agree with her. I met this fellow name Jim at the liver supporting group meeting. I saw him 3 times, I did not talk to him much but I am still praying for him time to time. Another patient, she was my next door when I was in the hospital. I still remember her name...Ms. Huge, Hope she is well. As Inga siad we are all in the same boat, how true! I learnt one thing when waiting for my new liver to come, we all must wait! Money can't help just wait!
Inga said: We are bound to the people of the Liver Transplant Unit because we owe our lives to them. I have never been of docile temperament, but I do what the LTU people tell me, because I am their creation.
I said: I love my Liver Transplant Unit people in Gainesville, Florida. Listen and do what the LTU telling you. They know what they are doing. My doctors and all of them are in my prayers.. I thank God for creating such doctors and caring people. I do wish that I do not want them to die ahead of me. I need them more than they need me!
Inga said: Most of the ones who spoke to me during my several hospital stays didn't talk about religion or dying at all: they talked a bout journey and opportunities for growth. They would stumble around in their metaphors for a while, and then go away. But there was one woman, officially a chaplain, who would turn up at any hour and who had a rare talent for unraveling knotted angers and fears. I say she can do that because she is an extraordinary person. She would say she can do it because of her faith!
I said: I am not an extraordinary person. I still not a perfect person but this is what I prayed to Lord Jesus: "Lord, you raised the dead, you let the blind see, you let the deaf hear again..I believed in your miracles. Help me God". That's all I prayed and I believed in it!
Inga said: I knew that family and friends would grieve, there was nothing I could do about that, or indeed about anything_ a small, luxurious abdication of responsibility.
I said: I knew some how my close family is thinking that I will face my short life. My mother in law even told me that we should say something to my son. I told to myself... I will do that the day that I know I am going die soon. I also realized that Me, myself is the one need to cope this with my prayers. I did form a talking group in my email, it's help me alot. This was real helping me with my lonely time. Knowing friends and family are praying for you is the best medicine. Believe me, what the transplant patient wanted the most is ...to hear kind, lovely words and care.
In my sick life I got some books as a present. I like the one written by Lance Armstrong, Dr. Chamberland gave it to me. Now this book Agamemon's Kiss, I like it too. Thank you Nick!
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